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Amanda

Hello, my name is Amanda Gouge. I'm currently incarcerated for possession of meth. my possession charge is for a canister on a key chain to my buddy's truck keys that had residue of meth and marijuana. it didn't matter that it wasn't my truck, automatically i got charged with it because i was the one driving the vehicle and the only one in the car. But that's how the state of Idaho's justice system works. i got two and a half plus three and a half years for it. they didn't even give me a chance to do rehab. they threw me in a prison to do some classes with prisoners and called it treatment. the mentality of those other people are all about still using so i don't understand how that is supposed to help addicts like me. I recently got removed from the work center for relapsing because i worked at a job that put me in bad situations every day because my co-workers used and eventually i relapsed. addicts can only be around their drug of choice so long before it is once again an issue and the work center refused to listen when I asked for help by telling me there was nothing they could do. the reality of the situation is this... all IDOC cares about is the money they make, not the well being of the people. to them we are just numbers and a paycheck. they judge us and don't even know us. we get passed up for petty things without even getting a chance to defend ourselves because only our paperwork goes in front of board. we lose our lives and our loved ones have to go without us. people with drug addictions don't deserve prison for petty possession charges. most of us get caught up for residue, or dirty paraphernalia and it costs us years of our lives. our kids are raised by other people and its not okay. we get caught in the clutches of IDOC and disappear down this black hole. instead of helping us they put us in a position that unless you are strong minded, u will break or get lost. we deserve a chance to be helped as individuals because each one of us is a person with a mind of our own. i know if i got the help i asked for instead of the help other people thought was what i needed, then i wouldn't be here now or in the situation i'm in. i know i just want to go home and be a mom to my boys and a good wife to my husband but i am stuck here doing what other people think is best for me. they cant know whats best for me because they don't know me. i know i have an addiction that i can overcome if given a chance. Thank you so much for your time.

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